Ads from MoS magazine. Old but funny as fuck Ads from Ministry of Sound Magazine. LONELY HEARTS COLUMN IN MINISTRY OF SOUND MAG THIS MONTH. ARE YOU AGED 18-30,female,slim build,into hardcoretechno, a recent graduate and into politics? Then Fuck off! I want a shit-thick 16 year old handbag bird with no opinions and massive tits! Reply to xxxx WHERE YOU THE GIRL with braids, blue T-shirt,platform trainers,dancing to left of the stage during JFK's set at Passion last Friday? I was the guy curled up under the speaker stack.I meant to talk to you but I was hallucinating and I thought you had a wolf's head and flippers. But I'm ok now! Reply to xxxx ATTENTION ALL MAD clubheads in the Toxteth area going to Cream this weekend. Me and my mates are going to nick all you valuables while you're out because we're thieving scally bastards. Reply to xxxx IF YOU ARE a group of around four house fans in the Acton High Street area of West London and you're particularly into old skool Chicago sounds,please turn your stereo down because some of us are fucking trying to get some bastard sleep. Reply to xxxx ARE YOU THE TALL BLACK-HAIRED GUY in the black and silver Versace shirt who I shagged in the Ministry toilets about three months ago without any form of birth control. Please write to me.I'd...ummmm...love to hear from you. Just to see how you are and stuff. Don't worry,there's nothing to worry about. Really. It's just that I'm going to have a...ummm...a PARTY! Yes,that's it. A party. Reply xxxx WANTED:COCAINE Lots of it. Reply to xxxx ARE YOU THE man standing three feet away from me at the bar in Fabric, smiling weakly and smelling rather too strongly of Issey Miyake? Because if you look at my tits one more time, I am going to glass you. Reply to xxxx
THE BEST ONE IVE SEEN IS... are you the man with the blue hard yakka pants and white striped shirt on from the arches on friday? If so may i take this chance to suggest you change your dietary habits, as i was next in the cubicle and the brown loave u left minged!
Cant be me - although I might be issey, I never go to Fabric. Trade.... maybe...... JOKING !! DONT PANIC! We *BOTH* know who the 2nd from last is !!